my pussy > the Beatles
Anyone who thinks this way has never listened to The Beatles.
Sike bitch u never tasted this pussy
"stop saying straight men are weak and pathetic"
i had to listen to a man describe how the fact that his girlfriend’s farts are louder and stronger than his is making him feel self conscious and emasculated on the radio today
We also have Spicy Autism, Hot Autism, Garlic Autism and Honey Mustard Autism
mass effect 3: the fault in our star child. a young adult novel about a different kind of hero
so my mum told me that as a kid she would peel an apple and throw the peel over her shoulder, and the peel would take the shape of the first letter of her future spouse. naturally, i decided to do it and
i’m fucking crying
it says ‘no.’
it literally says NO.
oh my god
what’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination?
i hate this i hate u
who gonna suck your heart.
do not fall in love with people like me.
i will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth. i will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. and when i leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people.
So a while back i was at this party and i was the first girl to arrive and there were like 20 guys already there, we were all siting around, having a beer and whatnot when the dj arrived. So all the guys went out the front of the house to help set up the dj gear and it was just me sitting there alone in the backyard for like 5 minuets. I stood up to go follow them bc i was getting really bored when i realized something, my period had gone through my white pants and stained the while chair, i was humiliated, i had no idea what to do, i could hear the guys were coming back and i had to do something quick, time was running out. So i grabbed the chair, ran like 10 meters and threw it over the fence into the neighboring yard, i quickly walked back and tied my jacket around my waist. The guys soon returned and didn’t suspect a thing, i am amazing.
let’s go all
the way tonight
*tips chromosomes* m’tosis